The Low Down on the Slow Down
Willy the Walrus is a fat slob from Antarctica. He's drunk 90% of the time no he's not hung over shut up with your med school logic geeze lay off my creative freedom.
He slows down Ronic and Friends™ with his pessimistic attitude and but mostly his blubber.
He hates living and is an anti-villain towards Ronic and Friends™
He is 12, a Sagittarius and considers himself to be the Avatar. He cries while listening to Country music.
He can literally control all four elements, plus the element of surprise. He sucks at surprises. Espcialy surprise parties. Don't invite him to surprise parties. You'll hate the surprise party.
Willy The Walrus was borne to Mr. and Mrs. Emperor Penguin. It was quiet a surprise to the entire population, and Mr. Emperor Penguin spent a couple months in a deep, dark, depressed hole in the ground.
But! It was al right in the end, when Mrs. EP gave him a wild night and they had a cool penguin baby. This started the down ward spiral that was Willy the Walrus's miserable life.
It got worse when Ronic and Friends™ came into his life and brought him on joyous adventures he could never fully enjoy, because his blubber made it hard for him to fully enjoy said adventures, because he's fat.
Dig: he thinks she's the coolest party phat cat and would ask her to marry him if he wasn't a blubbering mess around women he finds attractive. Her murder tieme would release him from this plane of existence and he would kill himself so she wouldn't have to dirty her beautiful nails that which she skinned off. Don't tell her that he thinks this, he wants to see the hate boil in her beautiful eyes as she plan the best way to ram her statan spear through his layers of fat to end his greasy, terrible man hood.
"Geeze Ronic what the fuck who does that any more what the fuck.. "
"Yeah, I'm fat, No need to make fun of me for it, since I, ya know, already want to die."
"I can't decide: if I had sisscors for hands, would I end my own life or become a mass murderer." 100% sober